Imagine you have been elected to a state legislative body. You are a member of the minority party. The majority feel that they can do whatever the hell they want and so proceed to launch some utterly batshit crazy bills. Since you are part of the minority you don’t have enough votes, so what can you possibly do?
What follows is an illustration of a very smart and clever response that was crafted to make a point and draw attention to the utter absurdity of the original bill.
It all relates to an attempt by conservatives to make library Drag Queen Story hours illegal.
First the basics – what exactly is Drag-Queen story hour?
Drag Story Hours are library events that were initiated by author Michelle Tea in 2015 in San Francisco. There are basically two goals – promote reading, and also introducing diversity.
Deeply dark nefarious sexual things happen at these events … oh wait, that’s a conservative lie.
What actually happens is that the event, hosted by a drag queen, involves the reading of a children’s book to kids who are aged 3-11. The idea has proven to be popular and so there are roughly 35 non profit chapters across the US running events like this on a regular basis.
The problem is that there are a few batshit crazy religious nutters that are deeply opposed to this. Their utterly absurd ideas have gained traction amongst the right-wing tribe, and so it has become a badge of membership within that tribe to adopt that extremist stance.
A petition presented to the American Library Association (ALA) that demanded they stop supporting such events claimed …
“use the library’s privileged position in the community as a source of knowledge to introduce children to sexual concepts which are well beyond their understanding”
My one word response – bullshit.
Cross-dressing in the context of a bit of entertaining fun is a very long established tradition that goes back centuries. Have these folks never heard of pantomime?
The ALA response was, quite rightly, the following polite fuck-off …
ALA, through its actions and those of its members, is instrumental in creating a more equitable, diverse, and inclusive society. This includes a commitment to combating marginalization and underrepresentation within the communities served by libraries through increased understanding of the effects of historical exclusion.
OK, so let’s move on to what has happened in Nebraska.
The Nebraska Anti-Drag bill
Some Republicans in Nebraska are attempting to create a bill to ban kids from attending drag-queen story hour events.
The proposed bill is LB371 – you can find the details of it here.
It is Titled “LB371 – Prohibit an individual under nineteen years of age or under twenty-one years of age from being present at a drag show as prescribed”.
How the hell to you handle that if you are in the minority party?
The Smart Response
Senator Megan Hunt amended the bill as follows …(You might want to consider popping a cushion under your jaw because it is about to hit the floor) …
AM74
Strike the original section and insert the following new section:
Section 1.(1) The Legislature finds that there is a well-documented history of indoctrination and sexual abuse perpetrated by religious leaders and clergy people upon children. Abusers within churches and other religious institutions often use events like church or youth-group-sponsored camps and retreats to earn children’s trust and gain unsupervised access to such children in order to commit such abuse.
(2) For purposes of this section, religious indoctrination camp means a camp, vacation Bible study, retreat, lock-in, or convention held by a church, youth group, or religious organization for the purpose of indoctrinating children with a specific set of religious beliefs.
(3)(a) No individual under nineteen years of age shall be present at a religious indoctrination camp. Any person nineteen years of age or older who knowingly brings an individual under nineteen years of age to a religious indoctrination camp shall be guilty of a Class I misdemeanor.
(b) No individual under twenty-one years of age shall be present at a religious indoctrination camp if alcoholic liquor is being served at such location, regardless if such alcoholic liquor is being served as part of a religious ceremony.(4)(a) Any business, establishment, or nonprofit organization that hosts a religious indoctrination camp and allows an individual (i) under nineteen years of age in violation of subdivision (3)(a) of this section or (ii) under twenty-one years of age in violation of subdivision (3)(b) of this section to be present at a religious indoctrination camp shall be fined ten thousand dollars for each violation of this section. Any fines collected under this section shall be remitted to the State Treasurer for distribution in accordance with Article VII, section 5, of the Constitution of Nebraska.
(b) An officer or owner of a business, establishment, or nonprofit organization that hosts a religious indoctrination camp and knowingly allows an individual (i) under nineteen years of age in violation of subdivision (3)(a) of this section or (ii) under twenty-one years of age in violation of subdivision (3)(b) of this section to be present at a religious indoctrination camp shall be guilty of a Class I misdemeanor.(5) No state agency that receives state funds shall use such funds to host a religious indoctrination camp.
Note section 4a … a $10,000 dollar fine for attending a religious indoctrination camp … chief’s kiss right there.
Cue religious heads exploding when finding out about this.
Is this serious, does she really want to see this happen?
Nope, she is simply using it as a means to illustrate to how batshit crazy the original bill actually is.
She knows her amendment will never pass, and makes this very clear that if this did have the votes to pass, then she would withdraw it …
It’s a very smart play.
Totally devoid of any irony, the guy pushing back “thinks” she is wasting time doing stunts like this.
You know what actually wastes time?
The original bill does; that is just political theatre designed to pander to the mob.
The Amendment does also contain a rather embarrassing truth.
If there was real concern regarding young kids being abused, then it really is the churches that would need to be regulated. To be specific …
- Number of kids abused during Drag Queen Story hour in a library – zero. They are literally trying to solve a problem that does not actually exist.
- Number of Kids abused by a Pastor, youth leader, or Priest – lots. For example if I google it then here are a few examples from this past week … here, and here, and here … rinse and repeat every single damn week. It is so common that it is no longer newsworthy.
Meanwhile Senator Megan also filed a motion to kill the entire bill.
One last Thought on that bill
If you are still struggling with the merits of this vaguely worded bill, then consider this.
If it passed it would become illegal for kids to go see Billy Wilder’s 1959 classic comedy “Some Like it Hot“. It is considered to be one of the greatest movies of all time, so banning kids from seeing that really would be a crime.